Muddy Me Chasing Chimpanzees

Everything always seems so innocent and fun when I agree to do it: The head chauffer in N'Zerekore was telling me about a place on Mount Nimba where you can go and hike and see the chimpanzees. I though, "Hey, sounds like one of the very few things that you can apparently do around N'Zerekore on a weekend." So didn't think too much about it and agreed to go.

He said it was 40 km from N'Zerekore. I thought that means about an hour or so. 2.5 hours later we arrived at the Bossou Chimpanzee Research Center. I paid my $10 entrance fee and then paid another $10 for my driver for security and translation reasons... and we walked outside to go see the chimps.

And of course, the sky opened up and it started POURING only as can happen in the African rain forest during the rainy season. The guide didn't mention anything about it and just took off walking into the bush. So we followed, practically running behind. About 5 minutes into it, as it was getting muddier and muddier on the side of the mountain, I started thinking that this was a very very baaaaaaaaaaaaaad idea. But I thought, "Hey, it can't be that far to see the chimpanzees and then go back."

Two hours of tromping around the mountain following the trail of the chimps, slipping in sliding down on my hips and butt through the mud only to stop myself by grabbing and holding onto hanging vines and branches, I told the driver, "Look. I don't care if I see the chimpanzees. I just want to make it out of here without breaking my body. If we aren't going in the direction of the car, stop and turn around."

They thought that was funny: Of course she's joking... she'd definitely like to have a broken leg in a place where there is no health care system for the sake of seeing chimpanzees. Definitely. And they just kept chasing down the chimps.

And I kept slip/sliding in the downpour and trying not to kill myself or them for the next hour or so until we got to a road. They said, "SHHHHHHHH! The chimps are going to cross the road now." So we waited. And waited. And waited. And I said, "Um. Excuse me. I paid for this little excursion and I'm calling BS on this whole thing. We're going to the car now."

I started walking. I got back to N'Zerekore that night and was talking to the other expats who comforted me with:

• "Oh yeah, the chimps were sitting outside the building when I was there." [shall I punch you now or later?]
  
• "We only hiked for around 45 minutes to see them. No big deal."
• "I remember that when Jessica (the only other American who has lived in N'Z in the past year or so) went, she hiked for 5 hours and didn't see the chimps."

So I've reached two possible conclusions on the experience:

1. The Chimps of N'Z are anti-American.
   
2. Or, as Sergeant Andres Rivero of the US Marine Corps detachment in the US Embassy Conakry pointed out: "Maybe the Chimps are just smart enough to get in out of the rain?"

About right.